My question to the world today is: why is it that fitness and healthy lifestyles are usually associated with the goal to lose weight? I think whatever the answer is to this question will be the cure to a lot of issues involving the insecurity epidemic that has hit not only my generation, but most of the world.
Weight loss is usually the goal people want to achieve when they start on a new diet that Jenny Craig is advertising, signing up at a gym, or good old fashion style- hitting the pavement with a pair of runners. I mean, who doesn’t want to look better in a bathing suit next summer or feel radiant in that slim fit dress? Losing weight can be a life saver health and confident wise! But where my concern lays is in the constant advertising and glorifying of it. Somewhere down the line someone went ahead and declared the scale the king of success because we’ve become very reliant on it to determine our progress. The number has become the obsession of millions of adults and I don’t think we quite understand the affects it has on younger generations.
I, much like many of my fellow teenagers, have had my fair share of poor self esteem and body image experiences. Back in grade nine I decided that if I lost weight it would mean that I would look better and then I would feel better about myself because of that. And since society only ever advertised the benefits of just losing weight, I took the fastest track I could find to achieving my goals: not eating. I won’t go into details, but of course that path took a quick downward spiral. I developed huge anxiety about ever being around food and God forbid, being with people when that happened. I convinced myself that it was food that made my stomach hurt so much opposed to the real reason being the lack of it. But I threw all those side effects aside because I started fitting extra small shirts and size 2 pants. So hazaa! I had achieved my goal! However, I felt sick 24/7, constantly tired, pale, weak and fragile. But of course, none of that mattered to me, the only thing I cared about was the fact I got compliments (COMPLIMENTS!!) on how skinny I’d gotten. Another side effect was my unwavering devotion to multiple checks on the scale per day. Man, that number mattered to me more than my marks in school. I feared the day that number would even go up a pound. I wanted to see results just like the world told me I should.
2 years later, I’ve gained not only all my healthy weight back, but also the confidence I never had when I was super skinny. I had to let go of my obsession with the scale (actually threw it out) and focus on becoming the strong, active, outgoing person I was meant to be. Today was the first day in a really, really long time (I can’t even remember the last time) that I stepped on a scale. I’ll admit a bit of the anticipation of watching those numbers calculate brought back some old anxiety but when it finally settled I was not only surprised with my number, but also my reaction. My natural, happy, healthy weight is around 120-122 pounds and today’s weight was 129 pounds. My old self would have probably had an anxiety attack, but the new me actually smiled. I smiled because in the past couple months I have decided to eventually start marathon running and began my training. Every other day I’ve either hit the gym or the pavement and balancing a, rather large, healthy diet (Yay food!!). I’ve worked hard to develop all the new muscle I’ve gained. For the first time in my life gaining weight means I’m achieving my goals.
Why was I never told how amazing I would feel with every new distance I run? Why was I never told how satisfying it would feel to increase my dumbbell weight? Why was I never told that I would feel even more confident from the curves of muscles forming in my arms and legs? WHY WAS I NEVER TOLD THAT GAINING WEIGHT COULD EMPOWER ME MORE THAN LOSING IT EVER COULD?
So unfortunately the world has decided to just send out one message of fitness goals. My reason for writing this was to show you another one. And I hope that you use this message to not only inspire yourself but also others into believing that self-empowerment doesn’t just come from losing weight, it comes from gaining it along with powerful muscles and an unwavering confidence.
Dignitize Your Life 